"Viscus, incompositus, ignavus, nuntius"
site search
what's here
Don't Blame Science for Climategate
Global warming just might be the most important problem facing Western
civilization since the cold war. Not because of anything the globe is
doing, but rather because our politicians have all gone stark raving mad
because of it.
Obama's Upcoming Inflation Crunch
It is a truism that government spending cannot create wealth.
Yet some economists, following John Maynard Keynes, believe that
government spending leads to disproportionately higher private
spending--a so-called "multiplier effect" that creates wealth.
Diagnosing Barbie
Barbie rose from poverty-stricken Wisconsin to become one of the most
spectacularly successful executives of all time, despite numerous medical
problems including a lifelong struggle with Tourette's syndrome.
Improved State License Plate Slogans
Most American states have pithy slogans printed on their vehicle
license plates. But do the slogans truly represent the state? I think not.
Why do people believe in God?
Where does the concept of God come from? Why do people believe in God?
In this article, I will try to avoid these political questions and simply
speculate, from a scientific point of view, where the concept of a God
might have originated.
Ben Stein's Curious Post-Modernist Adventure
Is the theory of evolution responsible for the Nazi Holocaust?
To scientists, the idea is as ludicrous as the idea that Marie
Curie is responsible for the atomic bomb, the idea that the theory
of gravity is responsible for wiping out the dinosaurs, or the
idea that "2+2=4" is responsible for four-wheel drive.
Questions and Answers About Text Messaging
Many people find text messaging to be baffling. In fact, text messaging,
also known as SMS, is very easy.
The Al Gore Effect: Theoretical basis
Recent research has shown that the presence of Al Gore is able to reduce
ambient temperatures by approximately 27.6°C. This phenomenon is termed
the "Al Gore Effect." Various theories about the physical mechanism of this
phenomenon, and its potential usefulness in fighting global warming, are discussed.
Politics in Nature Neuroscience
Another inflammatory political article has turned up. Not in
New Republic or Weekly World News as you might expect, but in the
scientific journal Nature Neuroscience.
The Prophecies of Bruce de Nostradamus
Bruce Nostradamus is not as famous as his older brother, partly because
his quatrains were not very good (they didn't rhyme, did not always consist
of four lines, and often didn't make sense), and also because he was not
as skilled at astrology as his older and smarter brother.
Global Catastrophe Imminent...Poor To Drown In Global
Drought...All Bush's Fault!
Just when you thought cooler heads had prevailed, and all
this global warming stuff had been dismissed as
politically-motivated hysteria, someone releases another
report to the media with even more fantastic predictions about
how we're all going to die because of too much carbon dioxide.
Man Vs. Wilderness in Washington, D.C.
Hi, my name is Grear Bylls. I've climbed to the foot of Mount Everest
and crossed the freezing North Atlantic Ocean in a small, open ocean
liner. Today, I'm going to tell you how to survive in one of
the most hostile wild environments in the world: downtown
Washington, D.C.
The Collected Physics Problems of William
Shakespeare
Problem 1: Shall I compare thee to a summers day?
An Overview of Santa's Advanced Anti-Radar Technology
For years, radar operators at airports have complained about the
difficulty of detecting Santa Claus on radar. But according to
radar experts, the inability of our most advanced radar tracking
systems to detect the red-suited Christmas icon is no accident.
The Thamnophobia Crisis
A new disease has been discovered: thamnophobia, or fear of Bush.
Its diagnostic criteria, possible causes, and treatment modalities
are discussed.
Intelligent Design: Is it a theory?
What is this all about? Is intelligent design really an alternative
to Darwinian evolution? Is it a valid scientific theory?
As scientists we must remain open to all new ideas, no matter
how bizarre. Many scientists have strong religious beliefs.
At the same time, if intelligent design is not a valid scientific
theory we should be honest and say so.
The Cow Theory of Economics
Cow theory is a well-established tool for
understanding basic economic concepts. There are many variations
of this theory on the Internet. Here are some new ones.
How to Build a Biological Weapon
Dear brothers, It's come to
my attention, from reading the news reports circulating in the decadent
imperialistic Western media, that the only factor preventing
Psychobabble as motivated political liberalism
A number of my colleagues in academia seem to be confused
about the nature of the two major political forces in America these days. A
particularly egregious example of this was a recent article in the American
Psychological Association's journal Psychological Bulletin ("Political
conservatism as motivated social cognition.
Duck and Cover
The idea that the only possible outcome of a nuclear conflict would be a
universal holocaust, in which everyone would die, as the movie "Atomic Cafe"
suggests, is simply false.
The Tragic Story of Schrodinger's
Cat
Schrödinger's cat played a critical
role in the early development of quantum mechanics. He is most well known
for his famous thought experiment, in which he postulated that a
measurement made by an observer could determine the outcome of a quantum
event. His paper on the subject, published in 1935 in the prestigious journal
Naturwissenschaften, established his reputation as a first-rate
theoretical physicist.
The Precautionary Principle:
Common Sense or Sloppy Thinking?
In this article, I will discuss several situations that have been
proposed as justifications for the so-called "precautionary principle",
and show that in each case, a risk-benefit analysis produces a superior
result. I will also show that, contrary to what has been claimed, the
precautionary principle is not commonly followed by
responsible public officials, scientists, or law courts, and
argue that it should not be adopted as an element in decision-making.
Smallpox, Indians, and Germ Warfare
The story of the British spreading smallpox as a form of germ
warfare against the American Indians in the years before the
Revolutionary War has received wide attention in recent years.
But is it true or merely politically-inspired disinformation?
Home Enervation and Repair
Some of the regular visitors to this site may have wondered why I have
not written many new articles lately. The reason is that your columnist
has been hard at work resting in order to find an excuse to to avoid
doing much-needed home repairs.
Hillary Clinton (D -- LV-426)
Okay, you already know most of the story: They welded the doors shut to keep her out.
Acid for blood.
What car would Jesus really drive?
An organization called the "National Religious Partnership
for the Environment" has started a national campaign to make people
feel guilty for driving SUVs. The centerpiece of this campaign is the
slogan, "What would Jesus drive?". This, of course, has driven people
into paroxysms of laughter.
What is happening to our puppets?
The only thing preventing puppets from committing crimes against
humanity, genocide, or even a second Holocaust is their lack of ability to
formulate ideas, hold opinions, and to move or act independently.
Atheists in foxholes
We atheists have changed our minds about foxholes. Right now, they
look pretty good. The news media, the Senate, and religious conservatives
are giving us quite a beating about that crazy ruling
The High-Tech World of Usama bin Laden
We haven't heard much from the media recently about Usama bin Laden.
So where is old Usama these days? The military, of course, is constantly
checking his mailbox for change-of-address cards for his subscriptions
to Jihad News and Shahid Death to the Satanic Infidels Report
Biochemistry as Portrayed in the Movies
Many people have pointed out that phenomena in the movies are unrealistic
from a physics standpoint.
However, as far as I know, no one has mentioned the movie stunts that
break all the laws of biochemistry. If anything, these offenses against
the laws of nature are even more improbable than the physics mistakes.
We Will Control the Horizontal.
The British press may have finally gone off the deep end. With a scare
article in The Economist, a news magazine that is
normally a bastion of reason and moderation, the editors have taken time
out from predicting the imminent bursting of America's economic bubble
to ruefully inform the world that neuroscientists are feverishly developing
Physics envy among biologists: fact or fiction?
Physicists often state their belief that all biologists would rather be
physicists, but became biologists only because they were not very good
at math. Why, physicists ask, do biologists seem unable to utilize such simple
concepts as the Riemannian-Christoffel curvature tensor or Galois fields in their
work?
Introduction to Quantum Thermo-Epistemology
This manuscript describes some of our recent findings in the exciting
new field of quantum thermo-epistemology, a branch of implausibility
theory dealing with fundamental questions such as: Why does toast always
land butter-side down?
Why do so many drugs fail?
Nine of every ten new drugs fail in clinical phase II or III testing.
Why is this?
Should you pursue a career in science?
Some advice from a professional scientist
Being a research scientist can be a highly rewarding career.
What you discover could change how people make their toast in the
morning, or it could change how civilization evolves--maybe even
prevent the next Dark Ages.
What Causes Alzheimer's Disease?
Azheimer's disease is a devastating and mysterious illness that strikes
people with increasing frequency as they age.
In this article, I will discuss the current theories and epidemiological
results that might explain the molecular basis of sporadic Alzheimer's
disease.
Cold facts on global warming
Even though global warming has become mostly an academic concern now
that the climate has moved into a cooling phase, it's still important
to understand what is and is not factual about the climate.
Tinnitus: Causes and Treatment
Recent research suggests that tinnitus is easier to cure when treatment
is given early. In this article, I will discuss what is known about
tinnitus and what tinnitus sufferers can do about their affliction.
Noise-induced hearing loss
Loud noises can produce both temporary and permanent hearing loss.
This article describes what types of sound constitute a hazard and
what you can do to mitigate the hearing damage if you are accidentally
exposed to a loud noise.
Introduction to population dynamics
Population growth can be calculated by a number of mathematical models.
The two simplest models are the Malthusian, or exponential model, and the
Verhulst, or logistic model.
Cholesterol and alzheimer's disease
Almost all of the major risk factors for Alzheimer's disease, with the
exception of head trauma, involve cholesterol in one way or another.
Myths about tsunamis
A great deal of misinformation is being spread about tsunamis.
This page attempts to correct some of these myths about "tidal waves".
Quantum consciousness, quantum information,
and subjectivity
The field of consciousness studies has become confused by the fact
that many scientists, discussing consciousness from different angles,
are really talking about other topics.
Mercury cleanup procedures
Mercury is extremely toxic. When spilled, vapor accumulates and is absorbed
by inhalation, causing long-term neurological and kidney damage.
Hazards of liquid nitrogen
Liquid nitrogen is not just a frostbite hazard--sample vials stored
in the liquid phase of liquid nitrogen can cause serious injury if
improperly sealed.
Photographing Fluorescently-Stained 2D Gels
This article discusses some of the common fluorescent dyes and describes
how to build a light source for photographing fluorescent 2D gels using
a CCD camera.
Interactions between Space-time, Gravity and Consciousness by Amrit Srecko Sorli, Slovenia. html format
How to Drive on Snow
Tips on driving on snow-covered roads and driving up hills in
winter without getting killed.
Build a solid oak giant binocular mount
Detailed plans for a sturdy, inexpensive binocular mount suitable for
astronomical viewing at high angles, capable of holding giant binoculars
with minimal vibration.
How To Get Rid of Woodpeckers
Wodpeckers may be cute, but they make lots of noise and drill large,
ugly holes in your wood siding.
Build an Air Variable Capacitor
Variable capacitors are useful in a lot of situations. But adjustable plate
capacitors bigger than 1000 pF are difficult to find, and those that are
available tend to be inconveniently large.
Dimming Fluorescent Lamps
Fluorescent lamps have many advantages over incandescents: they are available
in a variety of color temperatures, they have a large surface area that creates
a better architectural effect, they last longer, and they use less electricity.
However, it is also a royal pain to get them to work with a dimmer.
Identifying Sources of Radio Frequency Interference
Around the Home
Most people associate radio frequency interference (RFI) with electricity that
is arcing through the air, as when a power connector is corroded or has become
loose. But in recent years, many consumer devices have become widely available
that contain circuits that are intrinsically noisy.
Silence of the Lamps: Reducing Radio
Frequency Interference From Small Fluorescent Lamps
Tubular fluorescent lamps with electronic ballasts are very popular because
of their instant-on characteristics, low audible hum, and compact size. However,
many such lamps produce unacceptable amounts of radio frequency interference.
A Remotely-Tuned Loop Receiving Antenna for LW and MW
This article describes how to build a loop antenna for low frequency (LF) and
medium wave (MW) reception with remote-controlled tuning. Like all loop antennas,
it is highly directional, which allows you to null out unwanted noise sources.
A High-Gain 2.4 GHz Wi-Fi Helix Antenna
At microwave frequencies, many factors that are unimportant at lower frequencies
influence how well an antenna works.
Review: Roland Hpi-5 Digital Piano
The distinguishing feature of the Roland HPi-5 digital piano is a small monochrome
LCD monitor in the music stand rather than behind the keyboard as in many other
digital pianos.
Software Installation Procedure For Fuji LAS-1000 Plus
Gel Documentation System
This article describes how to install the controller software for the Fujifilm
LAS-1000 Plus Gel Documentation System, and how to disassemble the camera in order
to repair the Peltier cooling system.
Repairing Spex Fluorolog 2 Fluorescence Spectrometer
This page contains technical information we discovered when repairing our Spex
Fluorolog 2 spectrofluorometer (model no. CM1T11I) in room 341. It serves as a
reference for when the chewing gum and twine wear out, and we have to repair it again.
Recap of the News from 2050
Here is a recap of the major news events of the year 2050.
Predictions for 2007
Start stocking up on dried crackers and salted peanuts. The
coming year (which I predict will be called "2007") will be one
of the most eventful yet.
Global Trends 2055: A New Hope
The National Intelligence Council has just come out with its
predictions for the year 2025, titled "Global Trends 2025: A
Transformed World". I predict a little farther.
Computer Predictions for 2006
A remarkable new computer program has been devised that can predict
news events in the future. We use the program to predict future events
about famous celebrities from Einstein all the way down to Jessica Simpson.
Predictions for 2005 (and 2105)
The year 2005 promised to be so boring I made predictions for 2105 instead.
The Prophecies of Bruce de Nostradamus
Bruce Nostradamus is not as famous as his older brother, partly because his
quatrains were not very good (they didn't rhyme, did not always consist of
four lines, and often didn't make sense), and also because he was not as
skilled at astrology as his older and smarter brother.
imal
Scientific image analysis software for Unix and DOS (formerly tnimage)
Imal on-line manual
Documentation and image analysis tutorials
Using Imal In Windows
How to run the imal image analysis software in Windows.
Other software
Screensavers, lab timers, etc
Computer tutorial
Basic tasks on the server for beginners.
Linux installation notes
Miscellaneous tips in setting up linux.
Mollusc images
Photos of some of the specimens in our laboratory.
Procedures for using radioactive materials
On-line radioisotope calculator
On-line calcium/egta calculator
On-line centrifuge g-force calculator
